Here at GaySocialites.com, there is a always one staff member who sees all things aimed at teens and never misses an awards show. That’s our Associate Editor Christopher Dellea who tells us that Sunday’s Teen Choice Awards were a “total bore”, so we’re hoping to liven things up a little with our own Teen Choice Awards Awards.
Simply the match the number associated with the recipient pictured to their respective Teen Choice Awards Award below.
1. The Totally Looks Homeless Award goes to Robert Pattison.
2. The Best Make Up for Showing the Wrong Emotion Award goes to Kristen Stewart.
3. The Shouldn’t Have Tried Facial Hair Award goes to Zachary Levi (whoever that is).
4. The Most Homely Looking Girl in Hollywood Award goes to Selena Gomez.
5. The Dude Looks Like a Lesbian Award goes to Justin Bieber.
6. The Chef Who Looks Like He’s Starving Award goes to Gordon Ramsey.
7. The Got Lots of Botox To Look Young Tonight Award goes to Gwen Stefani.
8. The Lifetime Achievement Award for Most Out-of-control Hair in History goes to Shaun White.
9. The Straightest Bangs Ever Award goes to Cary Rae Jepsen.
10. The Best Dressed For Grabbing Beer & Wings goes to Dax Shephard.
11. The Too Tan To Ever Look Under 40 Years Old Again goes to The Jersey Shore Creature who acts like a DJ.
12. The Not-so-Straight Out of the JC Penny Catalog (since they like the gays now) Award goes to Chris Cofler and the chick he’s with.
13. The Still Dresses Like Fat Girl Even Though She’s Skinny (And still looks better than 90% of the other people in attendance) Award goes to Jordin Sparks.
14-16. The Women Who Know How To Put On A Show No Matter Where they Go goes to Rosie McClelland (14), Ellen Degeneres (15) and Sophie Grace Brownlee (16) because those women made the whole show worth watching (or so we hear).
And that concludes the Teen Choice Awards Awards. Let the teeny bopper attacks begin.
